Post Christmas

First and foremost, a huge congratulations to my beloved Washington Redskins for securing a playoff spot by defeating the hated Cowboys last night. I've had confidence in my team all season. We had a few heartbreaking losses and the tragic death of Sean Taylor, but still we managed to forge on. We have Seattle on Saturday and I shant wave my optimism. Go 'Skins!

I was home for a week or so celebrating the holidays. This was nice because I really haven't had the chance to be home for awhile. The week pretty much consisted of eating, eating, shopping, eating, returning, eating, sleep. The big event of the week was the celebration of my Dad's 70th birthday. Yes, the Big Guy turned the big 7-0. And although I ate possibly the largest meal ever (nothing shows my true appreciation better than taking full advantage of him), it didn't stop me from gorging myself the rest of the holidays.



And the holiday season wold not be complete without being forced out of bed at 5:30am the day after Christmas to be the first at the mall for post-Christmas slashing sales. And although getting up early is not my first choice, it is ultimately the best decision. Macy's was not crowded and I actually had my own personal shoe guy. Clothes were neatly hung on racks untouched and rampaged by the masses. Prices were really slashed and the hardest thing to resist was buying for the sake of immediately eBay-ing. After much restraint, I was successful in buying what I needed and leaving the extraneous to other bargain shoppers. By the time I finished my mall rounds at 10:30am, I felt like I already put in a full day.

As for New Year's Eve, I am continuing my tradition of rockin' it in with Dick Clark and falling asleep soon after. I hope the rest of you are spending this New Year with friends and loved ones. Be safe and have fun!

Quote of the Day:
"I like coincidences. They make me wonder about destiny, and whether free will is an illusion or just a matter of perspective. They let me speculate on the idea of some master plan that, from time to time, we're allowed to see out of the corner of our eye." -Chuck Sigars

Now I've Seen Everything

I was walking in Times Square tonight and outside of the Charmin public restrooms there was a person dressed up as a toilet next to someone dressed as the Charmin bear.

It was the saddest thing I have ever seen.

Quote of the Day:
"Regardless of what I do, I'm a hero." -David Letterman

The Farnsworth Invention

I had high expectations going into seeing the Farnsworth Invention on Broadway last light for the following reasons:
1. It's a play about the guy who invented television.
2. It's written by Aaron Sorkin
3. It stars Hank Azaria.

And what made it even better was that my ticket was free. Free always bumps things up a notch.

The play itself was pretty good, although not Sorkin's best work. He tried cramming a lot of information about the men and situations, and as a result, made the scenes a little clunky. I probably enjoyed it more because I was familiar with the subject. All in all, a good show. I would not recommend if you care little for television and/or science.

Quote of the Day:
"We did not change as we grew older; we just became more clearly ourselves." -Lynn Hall

Random Thoughts and Ramblings

It's been awhile and I don't want to deprive you of yet another edition of Random Thoughts and Ramblings. Let us begin:

* The Writer's Guild Strike really, really sucks. It sucks for multiple reasons. First, many of my friends are in the WGA and it saddens me to have them not work. This is a worthy strike though, and they should continue until their demands are met. Second, this lessens the available jobs for me in an already small market. And finally, I am in Letterman, Conan, Daily Show, Colbert withdrawl. I need new episodes. I missed Dave and his Mom play "Guess the Pie" on Thanksgiving. My favorite moment of the year. And too many bonehead politicos have had their actions go unobserved by Jon Stewart. So please mega-corporations, give the writers what they want.

* Top Five Songs Played on iTunes:
- "Radio Nowhere" by Bruce Springsteen
- "The City of New Orleans" by Arlo Guthrie
- "There's Always Someone Cooler Than You" by Ben Folds
- "Almost Lover" by A Fine Frenzy
- "Shelter From the Storm" by Bob Dylan

* Steve Martin recently released his autobiography focusing on his childhood through his stand-up career. I have not had the opportunity to read it yet, but I think it's a safe assumption that this is an absolute get and a must buy.

* Last night Cheryl and I went to see a screening of Walk Hard: the Dewey Cox Story, starring John C. Reilly. I probably haven't laughed this much in a movie theatre since seeing a sneak preview of There's Something About Mary almost ten years ago. I great broad comedy about biopics. Afterwards there was a Q&A with John C. Reilly, Kristen Wiig and the producer. It was as good as the movie.

* A couple of weeks ago I was walking on the upper west side and this woman stops and asks me for directions. It takes me a second to realize it's 70s supermodel Lauren Hutton.

* I really hate those store coupons in which half the coupon is small print in all the departments and items that are NOT applicable. Seriously, what's the point of printing the coupon when there are more restrictions than uses.

* Top 5 Non-Late Night TV Shows
- Pardon the Interruption
- How I Met Your Mother
- Dirty Sexy Money
- Project Runway
- The Biggest Loser

* Also striking are the Broadway stagehands. I feel so bad for families who have planned holiday trips to New York, revolving around a Broadway show, only to have it cancelled. One benefit though -- many restaurants that are impossible to get into, have zero waits. Might as well enjoy John's Pizzeria and Virgil's BBQ while I can.

Quote of the Day:
"Independence is my happiness, and I view things as they are, without regard to place or person; my country is the world, and my religion is to do good." -Thomas Paine

Loser

It is with great sadness in which I announce that I did not win the New Yorker Caption Contest. According to the readers of the New Yorker, "Give him a martini when he wakes up" was deemed funniest.

I would like to give a tremendous and appreciative thanks to everyone who voted for me. Next time, my friends. Next time.

Quote of the Day:
"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit." -Albert Schweitzer

Congratulations Abound!

The past couple of days have been full of love. I have been in the midst of so much love, that even I am becoming an optimist. With that said, here's why...

Congratulations and much love to one of my oldest friends Nathalie and her husband Armen on the birth of their daughter, Taleen Alice McOmber.




This is Nat's first child, and the first of the childhood friends to spawn. Taleen is very lucky to have Nat as a mother.

Yesterday, I drove to Pennsylvania to attend the wedding of my friends Jenn and Kevin. This was an all-around wonderful day. While being seated, a pianist was playing the score from "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown". Jenn looked absolutely beautiful. During the ceremony, and to celebrate Kevin's Quaker heritage, we had three minutes of silence to envision our good thoughts for the couple. This was followed by any family or friend who wanted to speak their sentiment aloud to do so. The ceremony ended with a lone bagpiper, and as we all know, I loves the bagpipes. The afternoon also gave me the opportunity to see some friends from "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy". I don't get to see them very often, so that was a treat in itself. The reception was just as lovely as the ceremony, with Jenn and Kevin really adding their touch to the occasion.

The Bride and Groom







Finally, a big, appreciative thanks to everyone who voted for me in this week's New Yorker's Caption Contest. The results will appear in the November 26th issue, and I will be sure to make a announcement if I prove victorious. If I don't, you shall never hear another word about it ever again, while I sink into a mire of pity and dispair.

Quote of the Day:
"There is only one happiness in life, to love and to be loved." -George Sand

The New Yorker Caption Contest

I am a finalist the New Yorker's Caption Contest this week. Please click on the link below to vote for me. Let's validate to the New York intellectual elite what you all have always known -- that I am very funny. Also, please forward the link to all family, friends, co-workers, random people you see on computers to also vote for me. I need all the help I can get.

Much thanks!!

http://www.cartoonbank.com/CapContest/CaptionContest.aspx?tab=vote&affiliate=ny-caption

Quote of the Day:
"For me, being funny is the best revenge." -Art Buchwald

Saturday in the Bookstore with Steve

After getting shut out of three Steve Martin events, I was worried that my streak of seeing him once a year in person was in jeopardy. With the help of the "Highly Admire" gods and PR flacks, that didn't happen. My yearly Date with Steve remains in tact.

This year's encounter took place this afternoon at Barnes & Noble. He had a signing of his new children's book, "The Alphabet from A To Y With Bonus Letter Z". He was accompanied by the illustrator (and New Yorker cartoonist) Roz Chast. Barnes & Noble denied us photography, so no visual evidence this time around, but he was wearing an olive green suit and crisp white shirt.

The irony was that this was a signing of a children's book, yet there were only a sprinkle of actual children. The majority were older people. One of whom, was a gentleman next to me who felt it necessary to give a play-by-play of the happenings. "He has his own pens". "He's drinking Fiji water". "She's signing first".

Because it was just a signing -- no Q&A -- and it was just a signing of the children's book, the line went by very quickly. I told Roz Chast I enjoyed her New Yorker cartoons and told Steve I was looking forward to his memoir next month. And then I threw myself at him declaring my undying love forever. OK, maybe not that last part.

I always treasure my moments of being in the same room as my Ideal Man. He continues to live up to expectations.

Quote of the Day:
"Each person's life is lived as a series of conversations." -Deborah Tannen

The Second Coming

Sleep was sparse in October 2004. Nights were spent watching the Boston Red Sox work their way through the American League playoffs. I wasn't going to let a little thing like sleep keep me from witnessing history.

I was at Game 3 of the ALCS vs. the Yankees sitting in makeshift bleachers in right field. The temperature was very low and the lack of effort the Red Sox were producing erased any chance of cheering to warm up. I could see the wind swirling and even dropped hot cocoa when my hands were too frozen to grasp the cup. The Red Sox lost to the Yankees in or about 22-7, one of the greatest Red Sox collapses. The Sox were down 0-3, and another season was to be over..

But we all know, that didn't happen. The Red Sox made heart-pounding comeback after heart-pounding comeback. Games lasted over five hours and extended into the wee hours of the morning. Never before had I dreamed so much of Tim McCarver. Every pitch was entracing. The sheer drama made watching almost unbearable. But I did. And over the next week, each moment was more exciting that the last. When the Red Sox did defeat the Evil Empire and put the Curse of the Bambino to the test, I was elated.

The World Series wasn't as stress-induced as the ALCS, but yet couldn't help imagine how they would find a way to lose. In the last three outs before their victory, I was on the phone with my Mom, a lifelong fan. She refused to feel any glimmer of victory until that third out was made. When it was, Mom was overcome with emotion and so was I.

Fast forward three years.

I am reading InStyle's latest trends in boots when the Red Sox win the ALCS. "The Red Sox win the pennant!!", Joe Buck yells. Jason Varitek leaps into Jonathan Paplebon's arms and I give an extended glance before returning to the article. The game had been on in the background for most of the night, but my concentration is paring down my unread magazine pile.

I don't care about this Red Sox victory. As I watch the celebration unfold, I have no emotion. No twinge of celebration. No jumping. No screaming. No manic phone calls. I simply return to my magazine.

My disdain is at the new management. I hate how they have whored out the Red Sox legacy. I hate how they ruthlessly discarded many of my friends who devoted years to the organization. While I have nothing against the players taking the field (save for JD Drew), the spark that made the Red Sox special to me is no longer there. It's been five years since I left and too much has changed and not for the better there. I am eternally grateful for the years I had and the family I made. It saddens me to see that gone now.

If the Red Sox win the World Series, I'll give a small smile. But this series is nothing I'll lose any sleep over.

Quote of the Day:
"I couldn't remember when I had been so disappointed. Except perhaps the time I found out that M&Ms really do melt in your hand." -Peter Oakley

Runnin' Down a Dream

It's no secret that I am a huge fan of Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers. So it's a safe assumption that my review of Peter Bogdonovich's 240-minute documentary, "Runnin' Down a Dream" about the band's 30-year history is going to be a bit biased. Here we go...

I have been eagerly anticipating this documentary since last summer. Although it comes out on DVD today, and will be airing on the Sundance Channel later this month, I felt compelled to see it on the big screen. It was shown last night at the Sunshine Theare and I was there.

I loved every frame of "Runnin' Down a Dream". What the band lacks in physical appearance and fashion sence is more than made up for in talent, ability, songwriting and stage presence. Part one focused on the band's roots in Gainsville, the formation of Mudcrutch and the move to LA.

Not a lot was new information, but I did learn that Tom exhibited pirate behavior more than once. He stole Ron Blair and Stan Lynch from another band. When Ron Blair left, he stole Howie Epstein from Del Shannon's band. As for songs, he kept "the Insider", written for Stevie Nicks for himself, and also Dave Stewart's "Don't Come Around Here No More". But having the best was important to Tom, and as fans, we are grateful for that.

Part two focused on 1985 to the present. After such care and detail was made to the first part, I was really surprised there was a complete omittance of the She's the One soundtrack (with the exception of a brief playing of "Angel Dream (No. 3)". That's a shame because it is a good album, and should have been recognized. Also, towards the end of the film, they show the band's live performance of Van Morrison's "Mystic Eyes". Although this is a great song, I would have preferred to see the band cover another one of his songs, "Gloria", which is one of my all-time favorite Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers performances. During the Highway Companion section, I was disappointed "Square One" was not played, as it is my favorite song.

There were so many great moments, that it's impossible to pick a favorite. I loved Dave Grohl and Eddie Vedder, two musicians I truly admire, wax so poetically about them. Seeing footage of the Heartbreakers acting as the back-up band to Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash were other highlights. I can't wait to get the DVD and watch it all over again.

Quote of the Day:
"Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I'm doing" -Werner von Braun

I Am Not Making This Up

For those who know me, my Hierarchy is extensive. There's the main Hierarchy and the sub-hierarchies. Growing up, the Favorite Writer Hierarchy had one name and one name only: Dave Barry. Dave Barry is a humor writer, and a good enough one to win the Pulitzer Prize. I heart him. His column was the first thing I read every Sunday morning. It wouldn't be Christmas unless Santa bought the new Dave Barry book. He was the best.

When I was a senior in college, he was having a signing at Brookline Booksmith promoting his first novel, "Big Trouble". Not going was not an option. The problem was that his appearance was at the same time as a class. This was a conflict because I had never been late for a class, nevermind skipping one outright. But this was senior year, and this was my favorite writer, so I opted to skip to see Dave Barry.

Meeting him was great. He was very nice and I made him laugh, which I was quite proud of. I even got to have my picture with him, which I have to honestly say, is the greatest photograph I have ever taken (Man, I wish I still looked like this). Circa September 1999:



Now, eight years later, much has changed. Dave Barry stopped his column. There isn't always a new humor book every year. David Sedaris, Sarah Vowell and Tony Kornhesier surpassed him on the Favorite Writer Hierarchy. Yet, when I read that he was going to be at the Union Square Barnes & Noble tonight promoting his new book, I couldn't resist going.

I got a seat right up front. By the time he came out, all the seats were filled. He informed us today was Talk Like a Pirate Day, so we all gave an enthusiastic "Arrrrggghhhh!!". He told us about getting older, AARP, and how he got his start. He was hysterical and it's been quite some time since I've laughed so hard. He asked us trivia question and the prize was a "Dave Barry for President" bumper sticker. I won one by knowing the name of the Clinton's dog (Buddy).



He did a Q&A before the book signing. Knowing he is good friends with Gene Weingarten, I told him that I was one of Gene's "I Heart Gene" chatters and asked about the screenplay they were writing. I also asked if the publishers put him up at the Hotel Shpennsylvania (a reference to my ALL-TIME favorite column: http://fodors.com/forums/threadselect.jsp?fid=1&tid=34939126). He laughed and signed the book and bumper sticker.

I was on the PATH before reading what he wrote. It brought a big smile to my face:



Shameless flattery definitely propels him back to the top of the Hierarchy.

Quote of the Day:
"Pez. It doesn't matter if it's a candy -- it could be a construction material for all we know -- but it comes out of Popeye's mouth and that's cool" -Dave Barry

Neil Patrick Harris Was Robbed!

"[Insert Losing Nominee's Name Here] was robbed!" That was pretty much my mantra during the 59th Emmy Awards last night. As all of you know, Emmy night is my favorite night of the year. And my expectations were not met.

But to show I'm not a total sourpuss, I'll start with the highlights:
* The opening with Stewie and Brian from Family Guy. Bravo!
* Portia de Rossi's dress. Absolutely beautiful.
* Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert giving Steve Carell the Best Actor, Comedy award by default.
* Lewis Black's ranting monologue against network TV executives. Credits go by entirely too quickly, or are so compacted you can't see anything. I want my credit, dangnabbit!!
* Kudos for Late Night with Conan O'Brien for winning Best Writing, Variety Series. They were 0-20 in nominations and it's about time they get their due.
* 30 Rock winning Best Comedy. I kinda have a crush on Jack McBrayer, who plays Kenneth the Page.

And those were the highlights. Now for the rest:
* What was up with that theatre-in-the-round. Emmy people: Don't ever do that again!
* Brad Garrett. Not funny.
* I have nothing against Tony Bennett. He is a wonderful man with a storied career. With that said, there is no way he should have beaten Letterman, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert for Individual Performance in a Variety Show. Last year it was Barry Manilow and now Tony Bennett. If you want to honor old musicians, give them their own category.
* I love Jeremy Piven. Really, I do. But Neil Patrick Harris is so incredibly good on How I Met Your Mother, that the Best Supporting Actor, Comedy award really belonged to him.
* Again, I like James Spader, but the Academy should have handed Best Actor, Drama to James Gandolfini one more time.

And now for fashion...
Top 5 Best Dressed:
1. Portia de Rossi
2. Felicity Huffman
3. Eva Longoria
4. Stephen Colbert
5. Kate Walsh (minus the horrible decision for that side-swept hair-do)

Top 5 Worst Dressed:
1. Jenna Fischer
2. Ellen Pompeo
3. Elizabeth Perkins
4. Vanessa Williams
5. Hayden Panerette

I was glad to see the classic deep red back in style. Loved the host of Top Chef's diamond necklace. I question William H. Macy's ascot, but I heart him, so it's hard to give him any criticism.

Overall, somewhat disappointing. I really need to become an Emmy voter soon to set these people straight.

Quote of the Day:
"Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired. " -Jules Renard

All The News That's Fit To Print

On Friday, my roommate Cathy and I were in the audience for the season premiere taping of the Ellen Degeneres Show. While waiting to be seated, we were approached by a reporter for the New York Times. We were questioned about our views for first guest Hillary Clinton. Honest, but diplomatic, we expressed our dislike for her. Here are the links to the New York Times and nj.com, that also made mention of us:

http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/08/31/degeneresclinton08/
http://www.nj.com/hobokennow/index.ssf/2007/09/dance_hillary_dance.html

Quote of the Day:
"Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you is determinism; the way you play it is free will." -Jawaharlal Nehru

Chick-a-go

If it's mid-August then it must be time for my yearly trip to Chicago. This is an eagerly anticipated trip to visit three of my childhood friends -- Karen, Jamie and Rosie. The tradition started three years ago for Rosie's wedding. We had such an awesome time, we decided to make it a yearly thing.

Last Friday started promising. The skies were clear and sunny when I arrived at Newark airport. I checked in, got my seat assignment, no problems. The gate agent gets on the loudspeaker at 1:25pm, which I'm assuming is to start boarding. I gather my things together. But instead of proceeding, he tells a packed gate area the flight has been cancelled. An estimated gazillion people rush the desk to get on the next flight or the flight after that. I'm somewhere in the middle of the pack. I call American Airlines who are of no help. I call my Dad who gives me the name of his travel agent. With her help, I am able to secure a place on the next flight. A couple hours pass and those once sunny and clear skies have now turned omnious. The packed plane boards on time but it has now started to rain. It's another hour before we take off.

Karen and her boyfriend, Ryan meet me at O'Hare. Seeing as my food consumption had consisted of 2 donuts and a pretzel for the day, I was a bit hungry. We met up with our friend Tania, who although we don't look or sound alike, are the exact same person ("You like obscure character actor William Devane??? Me too!!!") We ate at this excellent steak place called Wildfire. Great food, company and atmosphere. I was spent by the time Karen and I got back, and knew Saturday was going to be a packed day, so we called it an early night.

Saturday was awesome. Although it felt more like mid-October than mid-August. Karen, Ryan and I took the train into Chicago and met up with Jamie and Rosie to take a boat architecture tour. It was cool, but the rain held off, and the tour guide was really interesting. From there we ate at the sister restaurant to the Cheesecake Factory called Grand Lux. Very good. We then went to the Art Institute of Chicago. I saw Grant Wood's "American Gothic" which was a true highlight for me. From there we hung out at Rose and Jack's apartment to recharge the batteries. Dinner was at a mexican place. Karen, Ryan and I headed back to the suburbs, where Karen and I spared in Yatzhee and Monopoly.

It was Jamie and Rosie's turn to travel and they came to the suburbs. I had my very first Chicago deep dish pizza, which was par excellent. A tour of Frank Lloyd Wright houses and pedicures followed. The late afternoon led us to a Starbuck's to loiter and talk, which honestly was my favorite part of the trip. Before I knew it, I was back at O'Hare. The flight was delayed a half hour, which was almost on-time compared to what I endured on the way in. Got home around 1am. A whirlwind of a trip, but those are always the best kind.







And once home, I had to deal with the annoyance of getting a refund for the flight that was cancelled. I first call the online company I booked my ticket with. They direct me to American, since they cancelled the flight. American directs me to United since my return flight was with them. I call United and the customer service person says I have to go back to Newark airport to "un-check" myself from the return flight. I tell her no and that's stupid since I already took the flight. This is when I start to lose my cool. After venting my frustration, she puts me on hold and then gives me the number for the United Refund office. Why show just couldn't of done that on the onset, I don't know. Two hours later, I got my refund, but it was customer service runarounds like that that remind me why I like to drive instead of fly.

Quote of the Day:
"Health food makes me sick." -Calvin Trillin

Friar's Club

Wednesday was one of those roller coaster days that was downhill for the most part, then came alive at the end.

I awoke at 5am to the loudest rain pounding outside my window. There had to of been hail mixed in because I had never heard anything like it before. My room was lighting up by streaks of lighting and the only sound drowning the rain were the claps of thunder. An hour and 20 minutes goes by and not fully falling back asleep, my alarm is barely audible. I turn on the TV, and the first words uttered that morning were by veteran traffic reporter Joe Nolan saying, "In my 28 years of traffic reporting, I have never seen traffic this bad". Weatherman Bill Evans followed up adding, "If you don't have to go outside, don't".

As much as I wanted to heed the warnings of the weather and traffic team, I was forced to get up and get ready for the day. I had to go out to Long Island for a B-Roll shoot and meet my co-worker Jon at Penn Station. And since I had the tripod, I had no choice but to brave the elements.

So out the door I go with my backpack, tripod, umbrella and dress & shoes for the evening. The rain had stopped, but the humidity was unbearable. Two steps out the door and I was already drenched in sweat. I waded through my flooded street and onto the PATH. This was going to be a long day.

At 7:15am I am at the PATH station and about to go through the turnstiles when I hear the announcement that the PATH to 33rd Street is closed in both direction because of signal failure. The World Trade Center PATH was still running, so I figured I'd take that and then the ACE to Penn Station, still optimistic this day wouldn't be a complete disaster. I have no problems getting to WTC and all is well. I get to the ACE and am informed both directions are closed because of flooding. "Of course they are", I think.

So back up to street level in the humidity with my backpack, tripod, umbrella and dress & shoes. No cabs are anywhere. I star trekking north hoping for some merciful taxi to find me. 15 blocks later, one did and I breezed my way uptown finally reaching Penn Station. I meet up with Jon and only being slightly late, caught the next LIRR train. It took the entire hour ride for me to regain my composure.

The B-Roll shoot was fine. The hospital we went to were incredible and extremely generous. I wish all hospital were as accommodating as them.

5pm and we get back in the LIRR back into the city. I have to be in midtown by 7:30pm and the clock is ticking. As we approach the city, there is an announcement of 5 additional stops because of a home Mets game. This only added to my panic of not getting to my event on time. The train pulls into Penn Station a little after 6pm. Jon hands me the monitor and I head to the taxi line. There are 12 people in front of me and I need to get to the office, drop everything off, change and eat with less than an hour and a half. The taxi guy asked if anyone was going downtown. I popped up my hand and cut the line. Steamrolling into the office, I drop everything, eat all I can in about 2 minutes, throw on the dress and head back out the door. I have a half hour.

I find a cab not too far from the office. The drive crosstown was fine and for the first time that day, felt some relief. And then we turned onto Park Avenue with an endless sea of red tailights. There is nothing I can do except watch the minutes tick on the taxi clock. We're at a red light on E. 46th & Park with under ten minutes to go, and know I can walk faster than this cab. Get out and walk the next nine blocks. A couple of minutes, I reach my destination: the Friar's Club.

The Friar's Club is a historic New York landmark. It is meetingplace for anyone who is anyone in the world of comedy. They are the ones who do all those roasts. Cheryl, with her Writer's Guild connections, saw an event there, and asked if I wanted to go. Just being at the Friar's Club was exciting enough, but the event was the icing on the cake: performers and writers of Letterman, Conan, SNL and the Daily Show doing stand-up.

Cheryl and I go in and I can feel the history just standing in the lobby. We go to the bar and after the bartender looking pathetically at me after ordering a Shirley Temple, we look around. Jason Sudekis of SNL and 30 Rock is standing next to Cheryl. We see Rob Riggle and John Oliver from the Daily Show walk in. This is going to be an awesome event.

The Friar's tend to skew older, but seeing as this was a joint Friar/WGA event, I expected to see a younger crowd. Cheryl and I were two of the more younger ones there, and we were seated right up front in the Frank Sinatra Dining Room. The show was fantastic. Representing Letterman were Eddie Brill and some other writer. Conan: Mike McCann, Brian Kiley. SNL: Jason Sudekis and writer Colin Joost (hilarious). Daily Show: Jason Oliver, Rob Riggle and writer J.R. Halverstrom. Jason Oliver totally stole the show and Cheryl and I heart him.

The Friar's Club is what I envision New York to be. I hope to go to more events there sooner than later.

Finally I get home and fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.

Quote of the Day:
"If we are to learn to improve the quality of the decisions we make, we need to accept the mysterious nature of our snap judgments." -Malcolm Gladwell

Programming Alert: Cash Cab - After Dark

Beginning on Wednesday August 8th at 10pm on the Discovery Channel, is a new version of "Cash Cab", called "Cash Cab - After Dark". It's just like regular "Cash Cab", but more focused on nightlife, drinking, drugs, tattoos, and the like. I was a question writer for the show.

Yes, it's very strange that I, of all people, contributed to this format. But it was really fun and a learned a lot. For example, people will pierce anything.

And for all you "Mystery Diagnosis" fans, you will want to DVR tomorrow's show on TLC at 10 (while watching "Cash Cab - After Dark"). There is a segment about flesh-eating bacteria. In some scenes, I play said flesh-eating bacteria patient. Call me modest, but it's truly an Oscar-worthy performance.

Happy Watching!!

Quote of the Day:
"Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: If you're alive, it isn't." -Richard David Bach

Programming Alert: Grand Slam

Programming note!! Beginning tonight and airing every Saturday and Sunday this August at 7pm (repeats at 10pm) is band-new spankin' show on Game Show Network called GRAND SLAM. This show pits 16 of the top game show contestants of all-time against one another in an ultimate trivia showdown. I am very proud to have been a researcher for the show.

So watch...you may learn something.

Quote of the Day:
"No mind is much employed upon the present; Recollection and anticipation fill up almost all our moments." -Dr. Samuel Johnson

Hall of Famer, Cal Ripken

I have been waiting for this day for a very long time. This afternoon, my hero, Cal Ripken, Jr. got inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. I sit here with tears in my eyes, clad in the orange and black for today's ceremony.

There are four Cal moments that have been swirling through my mind all day.

The first came when I was 8 years old. Cal, Cal Sr., Billy Ripken and the Bird were signing autographs at Montgomery Mall. We must have waited a couple of hours, but I got my autographs, and still proudly have them.

The second was that historic September 6, 1995 night when Cal broke Lou Gehrig's consecutive record streak. When the game became official and the "1" banner dropped, I have rarely felt such elation. I cried through much of Cal's victory lap, and still get a little emotional every time a clip is shown. In these days of corporate sponsorship, steroids and tainted records, it remains refreshing to have a moment of pure professionalism, athleticism and personal achievement.

The third came on a hazy, ungodly hot summer afternoon at Camden Yards in 1998. I was interning for HTS, the Orioles cable network. I was helping Tom Davis set up his pre-game report. Having a couple free moments, I sat in on the bench of the Orioles dugout. Eric Davis and Brady Anderson walked by me. To my right, about 5 feet away was Cal Ripken preparing for the night's game. I was 5 feet from my hero. I was drenched in sweat and had a rapidly beating heart, but am still unsure if that was from being so close to Cal or the relentless heat. I looked over at him, and saw a man preparing for his job. And although he was my hero and a superstar baseball player, he was for that moment, a regular person. And it was at that moment, I stopped being starstruck.

Finally, Cal's final games at Fenway Park in September 2001. It truly is amazing I wasn't fired at some point in those three days. The Red Sox showed much patience and I am forever appreciative. I was asked by the organization to make a tribute video for Cal for his final Fenway game. I called my mom, and by the next morning, had every Cal momento collected through the years. In the one minute 42 second video, about 80% of the footage came from my own collection.

The Sunday before his last game was an afternoon game. Afterwards, I hung around in the Control Room, putting the finishing touches on my video. I took a break and saw Cal walking on the field with a video camera. I took that moment to go to the controls for the Green Monster scoreboard and punch in the number 8 in the At Bat section. Mikey, showing a rare kindness to my Cal obsession, but up the number 8 on the jumbotron. I watched Cal walk along the field, hoping in some part I made this walk a little more special.

The final Fenway game was a very emotional day. Anxious for my video and for the game, my other job told me to leave by 11am and I spent the rest of the day at the park. I watched Cal conduct interview after interview in the stands. When I brought down the radar gun before the game, I stayed down there for the pre-game ceremonies. My video played on the jumbotron. My video played on the FOX affiliate. My video played on HTS for my Mom to see. Later, my friends at FOX taped Cal watching my tribute. At the end, he nudged the person next to him and said, "That was nice". There are few moments where I've been prouder. I alternated watching Cal's at-bats down with Ed Riley and behind PA announcer extrodinaire, Ed Brickley. Much of the game is a blur.

Seeing Cal's final at-bat was coming, I waded through the packed Fenway stands back down to Ed Riley. He was right behind the backstop, directly behind home plate. He made sure I was right up front, with nobody blocking my view. Ed gives Cal the most perfect introduction and Cal takes to the plate. The video shows me clinging to the backstop, and tears rolling down my eyes. I'm yelling, "Thank you, Cal", "I love you Cal". I stayed down there for the remainder of the game. Although I should have continued to stay there, I headed back to the Control Room when the game ended. I spent the next hour watching Cal thank fans in waves of mutual admiration. I went home that night so thankful that I got to, in some small way, thank Cal Ripken for all the happiness he brought me for so many years.

So with today's induction, I am reminded of so many prominent Cal Ripken moments in childhood memories. And so with his induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame, I simply say thank you Cal.

Quote of the Day:
"Equations are the devil's sentences" -Stephen Colbert

10 Years Ago Today

Today is a very important day in my life. It's one of those days that was life-changing. Ten years ago today, I went to my first taping of "Late Show with David Letterman".

It was the summer in between by freshman and sophmore year of college. I had gotten the tickets a couple of weeks before and was so excited. Touching the tickets was like touching gold. I hyperventilated. I was finally going to see my idol in person. Life was good.

Monday July 14, 1997. My Mom and I stayed with relatives and took the train in from Connecticut. I had been to New York once before when I was really young, but I didn't remember much if it. I loved New York instantly. I loved the energy and pace. We walked up W. 53rd Street and I vividly remember seeing the Ed Sullivan Theatre come into view on Broadway. I look to my right and see a Roy Rogers. I am home.

Mom and I go to the theatre and get our tickets numbered #13 and #14 (the ticketing system has since changed). We spent the rest of the day walking around and taking in the sights -- the NBC tour, 5th Avenue. But each minute passed was a minute closer to Dave.

Finally the time comes for us to return to the theatre and we stood in line. We struck up a conversation with a teacher from Indiana who had come specifically to see Dave. I was very much in my element. Everyone around me loving Dave as much as me. Everyone knowing how many guys in bear suits fit in a coffee shop (23). I've never been so happy.

We seemed to stand in line forever. But I was too busy looking around taking everything in. Finally, we are ushered into the theatre. Mom and I are put in the third row on the right, the first complete row so nobody is sitting in front of us. It was definitely as cold as the rumor says.

This is when the life-changing moment happened. The warm-up guy, Eddie Brill, comes out, but I don't concentrate on him. I'm on sensory overload taking absolutely everything in. I'm watching the camera guys, and the stage managers and the prop people, and I have a feeling of overwhelming sadness. I want to be on that stage, I want to be part of this so badly. This is what I want to do. It was at that moment, those few moments before Dave came on stage, that I decided I was going to have a career in television.

Paul and the band were introduced and then the man of the hour came on stage. David Letterman was mere feet from me. He asked if anyone was from Indiana and the women I was speaking to earlier in line raised her hand. He called on her. She said she had come to New York to see him and to be a singer. They banter and he goes backstage. The show begins.

After the monologue, Dave brings the woman on stage to sing a song. She goes back to her seat and they Dave comes towards her, and hands her a canned ham. Dave is now inches from me. I am euphoric. On the tape of the show, you can actually see me stand a little in my seat. The woman is three seats to my left and I actually asked to hold the ham. She hands it to me; I am hugging the ham. And then I gave it back.

During the first commerical break, Inky the Cue Card Boy must have noticed my "highly admiring". He hands me a blue card Dave had tossed during the first act. I am beside myself. I am absolutely beside myself.

Tim Allen was a surprise guest for the top 10. Don Rickles was the first guest. Brendan Fraser was guest number 2. When Dave told the guests for the next night, he tossed his pencil into the camera. Inky hands me this as well. I honestly think I am going to combust. En Vogue was the musical guest. Dave says good night. As I'm walking out, Alan Kalter gave me the front page of the script. I hold my new momentos like one would hold the Hope Diamond or the original copy of the Constitution.

We head back to Connecticut having experienced one of the greatest days of my life.

I've seen Dave a handful of times since, the highlight coming three years later when I actually spoke to him. But nothing will compare to that first time, ten years ago today.

Quote of the Day:
"We do not remember days, we remember moments." -Cesare Pavese

More Bling

There must be something in the water...

Congrats and much love to my friend Rick on his engagement to his girlfriend, Sarah. I am very happy for them both.

Quote of the Day:
"No profit grows where there is no pleasure ta'en." -William Shakespeare, "The Taming of the Shrew"

Angelina and Eartha and J

It's been an interesting couple of weeks. I am enjoying writing for "Cash Cab". It's definitely a challenge seeing as I am writing for "Cash Cab: After Dark". With "After Dark", I have to write questions that are "edgy". Topics include drinking, tattoos, goth, piercings and the hipster scene among others. This isn't exactly my forte, which makes the challenge all the more fun. The job goes for a couple more weeks.

Two weeks ago, Cheryl and I took advantage of her Writer's Guild membership and took in a free screening of "A Mighty Heart". To be honest, neither of us gave a hoot about the film. We were there to see a Q&A with Angelina Jolie and others from the cast. OK, we were hoping to catch a glimpse of Brad Pitt. When we got there, all cell phones with cameras and cameras had to be checked in. The movie was sad, and that was to be expected. Angelina came out and she is very striking. Very thin and definitely had a presence about her. The questions were par for the course. Alas, Brad was not there. Or if he was, we didn't see him. It was one of those events that could only happen in New York.

Last Monday I returned to Carnegie Hall. Erin and I went to Eartha Kitt's 80th birthday celebration. She may be 80, but she still has it going on. She was amazing and is truly a national treasure. Her duet of "Santa Baby" with LaChanze was a highlight, as was Ben Vereen's serenade of "My Funny Valentine". Tanya Pinkins was also there to celebrate. She's performing at the Carlyle in the fall and I just may have to go back and see her.

On Friday, I made a rare public outing with my friends to celebrate J's birthday. Seeing as I genuinely like him, I didn't have much of a choice. I departed before the real debauchery began, but stayed enough to have 2 Shirley Temples.

And finally, much love and congrats to John Chandler and his new bride Amanda. The Chandler's were married on Friday in Cape Cod. I wish them nothing but the best and happiness.

Quote of the Day:
"What we anticipate seldom occurs; what we least expected generally happens." -Benjamin Disraeli

Oh, What a Night!

Ladies and gentlemen, the past 24 hours of my life:

Thursday
10:30am - Offered a job to be a writer for Discovery Channel game show "Cash Cab".

10:31-10:59am - Mini panic attack. Had been offered another job as well and weighing the pros and cons of what to take.

11:00am - Return phone call to "Cash Cab" and accept their offer. I am officially a game show writer!!!

11:05am - Turn down other job offer. Hope that I made the right decision and not burning any bridges. Feeling pretty good.

11:05am-6:45pm - "Work"

6:45-7:15pm - Commute to studio for "Grand Slam" tapings

8-10:45pm - Watch tapings. See that I am about two inches taller than Dennis Miller. He is awesome. The shows are real nail-biters. A lot of fun and wish to still be a game show contestant one day.

10:45-10:50pm - In a cab headed towards the PATH station. See more traffic than there should be and opt to get out and walk to Port Authority.

10:45-11:55pm - Wait/Travel home from Port Authority.

11:59pm - Get home and head upstairs. Discover the door to my bedroom locked. Do not usually lock the door and therefore do not have the key to open it on me. Landlord had been there earlier to fix AC and must have locked it on his way out.

Midnight - Overtired and panicing. Consider crying (but don't).

12:01-12:10am - Get a screwdriver and attempt to pry open the lock. This fails. Decide to slumber in the captain's chair in the basement. Roommate Liz is awake and offers me t-shirt and sheets. Write note to Meg, so when she sees my backpack outside my door, she'll know why.

12:15-12:25am - Attempt to sleep in captain's chair. Lower back pain confirms this is not going to work. Debate sleeping outside on the couch.

12:26-12:29am - Take cushion from couch and bring it downstairs. Make a makeshift bed.

12:30-12:45pm - Cannot sleep. Envisioning Meg reading note and laughing, causing me to laugh.

12:46am - Meg comes home.

12:47-12:55am - Meg laughing at me. Gets me an extra blanket. And laughs. And laughs some more.

12:56-2:00am - Cannot sleep. Want to sleep so badly. Think I might not ever sleep again.

2:00-5:00am - Sleep.

5:01am - Wake up.

5:02-7:15am - Kinda doze off and on but never really fall back asleep. Hear roommates beging to stir.

7:16am - Call landlord. Landlord assumed I locked my door. Landlord wrong. Landlord says he will be there in about an hour.

8:30am - Landlord arrives with giant ring of keys.

8:31-8:35am - Landlord tries all keys. None fit my door.

8:36-8:45am - Landlord returns home to get more keys.

8:46-8:50am - Landlord tries second giant ring of keys. None fit my door. Begin to wonder if I will ever see my room again. Landlord asks for my cell and calls his wife. I return to the basement.

9:00am - Hear my cell phone ring. Landlord is not answering it.

9:01am - Run upstairs to answer phone.

9:02am - See bedroom door open. Ask landlord what happened. Landlord took the screen off the bathroom, went on roof, and even though my window has no part of the roof on it, somehow got across and opening my bedroom door from the inside.

9:04am - Thank landlord for coming in and give him key to make a duplicate. Landlord leaves. I forget to ask if my AC is fixed. Too tired to turn on AC to find out.

9:05am - Collapse into bed.

10:30am - Alarm goes off. Get ready to start the day.

Quote of the Day:
"What we anticipate seldom occurs; what we least expected generally happens." -Benjamin Disraeli

Random Thoughts and Ramblings

It has been far too long and I apologize. So instead of long, drawn out stories, I give you another edition of Random Thoughts and Rmablings. Enjoy.

* Much congrats and love to my childhood friend Nathalie who is expecting her first child in November. Just when I finally start accepting that my friends are of the age of getting married, Nat has to up the ante and have a kid. This may take some time getting use to.

* Another congrats to my friend Alissa who is abandoning me for another Ellen. She so impressed the producers of "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" that they created a position just for her. She will be an Associate Producer of Human Interest Stories. I wish I could take all the credit of her success through my mentoring and friendship, but cannot. She has incredible ambition and talent and will no doubt be success in L.A. Sadly, she is probably going to win an Emmy Award before me. I best be mentioned in her acceptance speech. She also gets to reprise her role as seat fillers at the Tony Awards coming up this Sunday. She's come quite a ways from Queer Eye intern.

* You know what really, honest and truly frightens me? Those shoes that little kids wear that double as roller skates. They'll be walking and all the sudden start gliding. They totally freaks me out and don't like them one bit!!

* My home is still couch-less. We thought we found one on Craigslist. We paid for it and brought it home. Unfortunately we couldn't get it inside our home. Despite the many, many attempts we failed and is now displayed on our front porch. Worse, the person I gave it to never mailed it to the ex-couch owner. He requested I cancel the check, which I did, and which cost me an additional $30. Grrr.

* It has been a magical couple of months working at "Grand Slam". I have been working with incredible people and feel so grateful to be part of this team. I hope to work with these people again sooner than later. In the past two months I have personally researched over 1000 questions. Watch out trivia contests!! I want my free t-shirts and gift certificates and nothing will stop me. I even researched math! Nothing can stop me.

* Look for "Grand Slam" to start airing on the Game Show Network in August. I'll be sure to give a reminder just in case.

* Top 5 Most Played songs currently on my iTunes:
- Shelter From the Storm by Bob Dylan
- There's Always Someone Cooler Than You by Ben Folds
- The Warrior by Scandal
- U + Ur Hand by Pink
- Sunshine of Your Love by Cream

* Bundle up folks, because on June 23rd, Hell is freezing over. After two and a half years of utter and complete harassing, I worn my Dad down enough to pay New York another visit. Dad thinks New York is Hell, but I ropose that if he can fly halfway around the world to play with baby orangatangs, he can take a three hour train ride to visit his daughter. Only fair, right? (Although I must admit it's a tough call)

* A couple of weeks ago I made a triumphant return to Christie's auction house after a lengthy absence. There was an entertainment memorabilia preview that again lived up to expectations. The big item was a pink and gold dress worn by Audrey Hepburn in "Breakfast at Tiffany's", which sold for over $200,000 a couple of days later. Also featured were many lots from Laurel & Hardy, original Disney animation cells, as well as drawings of Mickey by Walt Disney. A lot of "Star Trek" stuff, including a captain's chair and costumes. Also, what was incredible to see in person was Steve McQueen's car. A hot car for a hot man. Good times.

* However, what I am not appreciative of New York are the onslaught of tourists who do not move or if they are moving, stop suddenly on the sidewalks. I hate these people with all of my heart and soul. Just move. Or if you do decide to stop, simply move to the side. Seriously people. It's not that hard.

* Season 2 of the Muppet Show is coming out in August. Awesome.

Quote of the Day:
"Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself; I am large, I contain multitudes." -Walt Whitman

Water, Water Everywhere

It has been an interesting time. What started out as something kinda funny, turned into something completely not funny.

I made a lovely steak dinner and literally just sat down to eat when the power went out at 6:45. It had been raining all day, so it wasn't too much of a surprise that it went out. It'll come back in a few minutes. Eileen and Suzanne come downstairs, we eat and light a few candles. The power will be back soon. Around 7:15 I get up and my sock is wet. I look down and the kitchen floor has begun to flood. We take the chairs and put them in the living room. I run upstairs and put on boots. It wasn't more than 2 minutes before I got back down. By now a layer of water is on the floor. We move more stuff into the safety of the living room.

We go outside to see if the power is out elsewhere. Our block is dark. A lake of water formed at the nearby intersection and the rain is still coming down. We are outside for about 10 minutes. We get back in and the floor of the living room is now wet. Trying to remain calm, we think about what to do.

Roommate Liz has all of her stuff in the basement. We grab her shoes and bring them upstairs to dry ground. We then try and get anything of Liz's that might get wet and bring that upstairs. The water is increasing exponentially. The water is as high as my boots and we are literally wading through the kitchen to save stuff. Liz comes home. The landlord also comes by to survey the situation. We even have the fire department check things out.

At 10pm the electricity returns. With the electricity back, the pumps begin working again. Over the next hour the water recedes. At 11 we go down again. Everything in the kitchen and living room is ruined. Couches, bookshelves, tables are unsalvagable. We begin sweeping and using what we have and make little progress. The fridge filled with freshly bought food is now spoiled. The smell of mildew and bacteria is overwhelming.

It's been a long 18 hours. Much credit goes to Eileen for keeping everyone calm and organized. There's a lot of work to be done. Gar!!!






Quote of the Day:
"Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, And don't put up with people that are reckless with yours." -Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

The King Turns 60

A very special Genius Switch wish to the King of Late Night, the patron saint of the Genius Switch, Mr. David Letterman himself, on his 60th birthday. In honor of Dave's birthday, I have donned my Late Show hat. It also helps that it is super yucky out and it was probably going to be a hat day anyways.

And not to be outdone, Happy Birthday to my Mom as well. Like me, Mom is celebrating her 29th birthday too.

Quote of the Day:
"I am the host of the Late Show, the most powerful man in American broadcasting." -David Letterman

30 Minus 1

Happy Birthday to Me,
Happy Birthday to Me,
Happy Birthday Meeeeeeeeee,
Happy Birthday to Me.

YAY!!!

The big 2-9 is not that scary yet. With that said, the day is young and I have 365 more days to accept that the 20s are behind me.

Thanks to everyone for the birthday wishes, cards, Shirley Temples and cupcakes. You all are the best!

Quote of the Day:
"You are a person who thrives on challenge, and you often feel that you must battle your way through life, depending upon no one and nothing but your own strength, intelligence, and courage. You believe in being totally honest, true to oneself and one's own vision and convictions, even if that means standing alone. Honesty, integrity, personal honor, and authenticity are your gods, and you have no sympathy for weakness of character in others." -My Horoscope from Astrology.com

Gen. Grant, Bagpipes and Scones

It's been some time in the making, but Cheryl and I had another installment of the Day of Fun yesterday: the Day of Fun - The Wrath of the Day of Fun.

The first stop in the Day of Fun was the New York Historical Society. After climbing many stairs to the 4th floor Henry Luce III Cultural Center, we looked at many items of not just New York, but Americana. My favorite piece was the to-size model bust of Abraham Lincoln for the Lincoln Memorial. The Luce center also had many items from colonial times and the Civil War. I particularly enjoyed the various presidential campaign buttons over the years. We then looked at original drawings of birds from the Audobon Society, before heading to the main floor. There was a special exhibit on Tiffany Lamps, especially those designed by Clara Driscoll in the early 1900s. They were all nothing less than truly spectacular. The sheer beauty and craftsmanship was overwhelming. After a short rest in the cafe, we went to the gift shop, which is honestly the best gift shop ever. Cheryl finally got her plush Gen. Grant she has been craving. In return, I bought a plush Lincoln magnet. I had to hold myself back from buying the temporary tattoos for librarians, including such messages as "I Heart the Dewey Decimal System".

After waiting what seemed like forever for the bus, we made it to Grand Central Station for the yearly Scottish festival. We weren't sure where to go, but then the lovely drones of the bagpipes guided us in the right direction. Sadly, the bagpipes were finishing up when we got there, but did get to see a demonstration of making barrels to hold whisky. I did get to see some men in kilts, but was overall disappointed in the selection. What can I say, Roddy keeps the bar high.

We were getting a little tired by this point, so we headed to the Village and to Tea and Sympathy. I guided us in the wrong direction, and we got to see a drug arrest going on. We also stopped by this awesome vintage dress shop. Tea and Sympathy was very snug. I had some scones, while Cheryl had her tea. Before we knew it, it was time to head back to the 'Boken.

All in all, the Day of Fun lived up to its name. Can't wait to do it again.

Quote of the Day:
"I am always prepared for lack of intellectual discourse. I cover television." -Lisa deMoraes, television reporter for the Washington Post

Heeeeeeeeere's Conan!

Last night I went to the Museum of TV & Radio, one of my most favorite places in New York. The reason: a seminar with Late Night host Conan O'Brien and four of his writers. Rather, a seminar with Conan O'Brien and four writers who say one sentence apiece in the two hour session. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I went to these seminars all the time when I was at BU. MTR is great with their satillite series and for TV geeks like me, it's a great opportunity to see the best minds in television let their guard down and really talk about their craft and the industry.

Conan was no exception. He is extremely knowledgeable and entertaining and one of the quickest wits around. It's been quite some time since I've laughed as hard as I did last night. He spoke of the writing process and his influences in television, praising the greats like Johnny Carson and David Letterman. The best part were hearing about some of the show's happy accidents, including the Finland show.

The funniest unintentional moments came from watching the face of the moderator. For the most part, he didn't know how to react. He would have that plastic smile face and morph into seriousness the next moment. Ahhh, comedy.

All in all a great time. The MTR really is an awesome place and for doing events like this. You should check it out if you have the chance.

Quote of the Day:
"What if this weren't a hypothetical question?" -Unknown

I Am Smarter Than A Fifth Grader

It brings me great joy in announcing that I am back among the employed with an uber-awesome new job. Starting Monday, I am a Researcher for a new game show called "Grand Slam". It's a tournament style show pitting all the top contestants of game show history (Jeopardy, Millionaire, Tic Tac Dough, etc...) against one another.

I've always loved game shows and one of my greatest dreams is to be on one. But because I am in the TV industry, it's hard to get on as a contestant because you wind up knowing someone and being ineligable. So this is the next best thing. Either way I'm getting paid to know trivia.

YAY!!!!

Quote of the Day:
"Look for the ridiculous in everything and you will find it." -Jules Renard

Larry "Bud" Melman

I am a horrible SuperFan for not posting this earlier. Last week, a fixture in the success both "Late Night" and "Late Show". Calvert DeForest aka Larry "Bud" Melman, passed away at the age of 85.

If you've never seen the clip of him interviewing passengers in Port Authority, go to You Tube and check it out. A wonderful comic relief for the day.

I highly recommend reading this wonderful tribute by the Washington Post's Tom Shales:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/03/25/AR2007032501211.html

Quote of the Day:
""Everyone always wondered if Calvert was an actor playing a character, but in reality he was just himself -- a genuine, modest and nice man. To our staff and to our viewers, he was a beloved and valued part of our show, and we will miss him." - David Letterman on Calvert DeForest

The 3's

I was up in Boston this weekend to celebrate the 3rd birthday of BabyBunny. It's incredible to believe that three years have gone by so quickly. I took my rightful place on the couch and watched the giant TV. There was cake and Utz's cheese balls, which I am entirely addicted to.

As you can see, BabyBunny was thrilled to have me there:



I have such a way with children. Happy Birthday BabyBunny!!

Quote of the Day:
"It is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma." -Winston Churchill on Russia

Perfect From Now On

A shout out and congratulations to my friend John Sellers on the publication of his new book, Perfect From Now On. The book chronicles his love of independent music, specifically Guided By Voices.

He appreciates pop culture and is a devoted SuperFan to his many interests. John has a wry and snarky sense of humor, and I think you'll really enjoy the book. It's a good read and I highly recommend you go to your nearest bookstore and buy it. NOW!!

Quote of the Day:
"Where is human nature so weak as in the bookstore?" --Henry Ward Beecher

Post-Oscar Round Up

Another year, another Oscars. This year's show had good intentions, but didn't completely deliver. Ellen DeGeneres did a great job, and I hope she gets asked back. There were entirely too many montages (did we really need Michael Mann's montage of America's influence on film at 11:15pm....no). The producers were wrong to wait over an hour into the show to hand out a big award (Alan Arkin winning Best Supporting Actor) and the 8:30pm start time had me feeling it was going to be a long evening right off the bat.

OK, now the good stuff. Best Dressed, worst dressed and notes:

Best Dressed:
1. Reese Witherspoon
2. Cate Blanchett
3. Maggie Gyllenhaal
4. Emily Blunt
5. Helen Mirren
Honorable Mentions: Japanese Actress from Babel, Diane Keaton

Worst Dressed:
1. Cameron Diaz
2. Kirsten Dunst
3. Meryl Streep
4. Jennifer Hudson (only the jacket part in the pre-show)
5. Jennifer Lopez
Dishonorable Mentions: Anne Hathaway, Quincy Jones, Kelly Preston (wearing leopard print to the Oscars in inexcusable)

Other Dress Comments:
* I thought Gwyneth looked gorgeous, and I loved the color, but not the
actual dress
* Naomi Watts would have been better without the sleeves
* Nicole Kidman would have been better without the bow
* Philip Seymour Hoffman needs a bath and a comb

Overall Notes:
* I am still distraught over a bald Jack Nicholson. He looks like Lex
Luthor. I don't like it.
* Do you think Peter O'Toole knew where he was? He looked like a
corpse.
* LOVED the Will Ferrell/Jack Black/John C. Reilly song. Brilliant!
* Happy to see Sherry Lansing get the recognition she deserves.
* Helen Mirren is awesome.

Quote of the Day:
"Peter O'Toole, eighth nomination tonight. Well, you know what they say, third time's a charm." -Ellen Degeneres

Good Morning (Oscar)

It's been said that something new is learned everyday. I believe this to be true. For example, yesterday I learned that something called a "5:15am" exists. That's when ye olde alarm clock went off and awoke me from my peaceful slumber. One of the things I've been wanting to do since moving to New York was to be in the audience for Good Morning America. I grew up a GMA Girl, and was waiting for the right time to see the show.

I saw that actor extrordinare, William H. Macy was going to be on show to promote his soon-to-be-on-video film, Wild Hogs. I adore him so much and was hoping this would be my opportunity to catch a glimpse. I get to the studio at 6:30am and the line wasn't long at all. We are ushered into the studio at W. 44th & Broadway. There is nothing going on in this studio for the first hour of the show, which made us wonder why there was even an audience needed. Then comes the announcement that Jerry Springer will be making his way to the studio to announce the next cast of Dancing with the Stars.



The 8am hour begins and the studio is abuzz. Diane Sawyer, Robin Roberts, Sam Champion and Jerry Springer come in. I am in the background for Sam's weather report. Jerry Springer announces the contestants. I'm in the background again for Diane doing a segment on yogurt -- and yes, I got free yogurt. It was 9am before I knew it and the show ended. Diane waved to the masses and Robin posed for pictures.



William H. Macy was there, but was interviewed upstairs, so I did not get a chance to see him. In the future, if there's a guest I want to see, I'll just go to the stage entrance instead of going in the studio. Live and learn. I had the chance to see John Travolta, who was coming in to pre-tape an interviewed. I stood by the stage entrance for a couple of seconds before realizing that I could care less about John Travolta, so I headed home.

Today, I headed back to the Times Square studio. In celebration of the Academy Awards, they had a real Oscar that we could hold and have our picture taken with. Of course, this was too good to pass up. I'm annoyed that I always look sleepy in pictures. I would have wanted to look better for Oscar.



So it's been a productive couple of days. If nothing else, it's proof that I actually left the house.

Quote of the Day:
"It is dangerous to let the public behind the scenes. They are easily disillusioned and then they are angry with you, for it was the illusion they loved." -- W. Somerset Maugham

The Greta Garbo Theory

The Greta Garbo Theory. Greta Garbo was one of the most beautiful and talented actresses from the dawn of motion pictures. Towards the end of her storied Greta Garbo's career, she became a virtual recluse. Garbo shunned the spotlight at all costs. So when she did make an appearance, it was quite the happening. Although I cannot claim to have any great acting talent, I do have one thing in common with the esteemed actress.

It is a rarity that I leave the house on weekends. Even moreso on a Saturday night. In the big city. It is the rare special occasion that gets me out of my cocoon and out and about with people. This rare occasion was Cheryl's birthday party. Cheryl, Meg and I made it to Sessions Bar after some transportation snags. I tried to see it as an omen for me to go home, but the Birthday Girl and Meg would have none of it.

So, I drank a Coke, bopped to the 80s cover band and had my very first picture taken with J.



All in all a fun evening spent with friends and for the great cause of Cheryl's birthday.



Back to hibernation...

Quote of the Day:
"To love someone is to see a miracle invisible to others." --François Mauriac

Beanpot

Once again the mighty Boston University Terriers are Beanpot champions!! This brings the Beanpot total to 28 titles in 55 outings, 3 consecutive titles and 11 in the past 13. The hated BC Eagles gave us a scare in the third, but we triumphed in overtime. Take that BC!! Whooooooo!

BC Sucks!! GO BU!!!

Quote of the Day:
"One of my theories is that men love with their eyes; women love with their ears." -Zsa Zsa Gabor

The King of Late Night

It is a momentous day in the life of the patron saint of the Genius Switch, Mr. David Letterman. It was 25 years today that "Late Night with David Letterman" premiered on NBC and revolutionized late night television, serving as an influence to many of today's top comics.

The genius of "Late Night" was that it did not appeal to everyone. The humor was dry and snarky. Characters like Larry "Bud" Melman, The Man Who Lives Under the Stairs and Peggy, the Foul-Mouthed Librarian had never been seen on television before and there was a shock and awe element to them, as well as a humorous one. Letterman took the best of Johnny Carson and enhanced it. Being on at 12:30am, he was able to be more honest and do things more daring.

A few moments in "Late Night's" history stand out. The first being Monkey Cam -- where a camera was attached to Zippy the Chimp and the show was seen through its perspective. "The Gong Show" (which Letterman often appeared on) served as a precursor to Stupid Human Tricks and Stupid pet Tricks. The first to jump in a suit of velcro, the first to dive into a bowl of Rice Krispies to "snap, crackle and pap" and the first to don a suit of Alka-Seltzer, David Letterman was daring. He was brave enough to have a high-on-acid Crispin Glover on the air, interview Bill Hicks and give a little-known disc jockey named Howard Stern his first national audience. Letterman also showcased the antics of Andy Kaufman -- including the infamous thowing of coffee in the face of Jerry Lawler, -- quite often and considers him his all-time favorite guest. R.E.M, Jon Stewart, k.d. Lang, the Wildflowers, and Bobcat Goldthwait all made their network television debuts on "Late Night". The show won for consecutive Emmys 1983-1987 for Best Writing, Variety and was the most recorded show in the 1980s.

After being unforgiveably passed over for "the Tonight Show" after Johnny Carson retired, Letterman took the show, renamed "Late Show with David Letterman", to CBS. Although now armed with a larger audience, Letterman kept this same wry humor. He enlisted the help of his Ed Sullivan Theatre neighbors. "Late Show" is not without it's water-cooler moments. In 1994, Madonna famously dropped the F-bomb 13 times. Drew Barrymore flashed him as a present for his 50th birthday. An entire hour was devoted to Warren Zevon; the last public appearance before his death. And all the while he never let little things like a quintuple-bypass surgery or the shingles keep him down.

Without David Letterman, Conan O'Brien, Jon Stewart, Jerry Seinfeld and Jimmy Kimmel would not be the successes they are today. All owe a large debt of graitude to Letterman and all the contributions he's made during these 25 years. In the 4506 shows (it would take 187.5 days or six months straight without a single repeat) he's done, he's proved time and time again that he merited Johnny Carson's crown as the true King of Late Night.

Keeping personal moments aside, here is a list of my favorite "Late Night"/"Late Show" moments:
10. Jay Thomas' Lone Ranger Story
9. Dave & Steve's Gay Vacation
8. The GE handshake
7. Dave's record collection
6. The Big Man on Campus
5. Dave returning from quintuple-heart surgery
4. Just Bulbs / Just Shades
3. Dave announcing the birth of his son, Harry
2. Dave and Richard Simmons going door-to-door in New Jersey.
1. Dave and his Mom playing "Guess the Pie" every Thanksgiving.

Quote(s) of the Day:
"Are we better than Letterman? No. The man is a genius and an icon for the ages." -Jon Stewart
"I love David Letterman. He's like the perfect man to me - offbeat looks, great sense of humor and super intelligent." -Drew Barrymore

Denny Doherty

A couple of months ago I was talking with a friend about music. He asked if I could go back in time and see any group, who would it be. It would have been awesome to see the Doors; Jim Morrison staggering around in a drug-fueled haze, slurring "Hello, I Love You". Or maybe the original lineup of the Who and see Keith Moon dominate a 25-minute drum solo. Janis Joplin had such a great rasp to her voice. I bet she was amazing in person. And then there's Elvis. Or the Beatles. After much thought I gave him my answer: The Mamas and the Papas.

The harmonies the Mamas and the Papas produced were revolutionary. John Phillips was a songwriting genius. There are few others more beautiful than Michelle Phillips. Cass Elliot had a zest for life which resonated through her voice. And Denny Doherty united these voices. Although they are best known for "California Dreamin'" and "Monday, Monday", it's their lesser known songs that were my favorites. "Creque Alley" told the story of how the bank formed. "I Saw Her Again Last Night" was John Phillips revenge song for Denny and Michelle's affair. Although the group only lasted three years, their music remains timeless.

I was saddened to hear of Denny Doherty's passing last night. I was fortunate to see Denny once. Soon after moving to New York, I saw him perform a couple of songs from Dream a Little Dream, his off-Broadway show about the formation of the group at Bryant Park. It would be the closest I'd ever get to seeing them as whole.

The Mamas and the Papas were inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame in 1998. With Cass Elliot's death in 1974 and John Phillips in 2001, Michelle Phillips remains the last member of the group. I highly recommend picking up or downloading one of their CDs and dream a little dream of one of rock & roll's finest.

Quote of the Day:
"You may delay, but time will not." --Benjamin Franklin

Congrats Cal!

Today is a very momentous day because my Hero, the one, the only, the greatest baseball player of all-time, Cal Ripken, Jr. has officially been voted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. My beloved blue-eyed Oriole got a whopping 98.53% of the total vote, the third highest percentage ever. The ceremony takes place on Sunday, July 29th.

Also, congrats to another worthy inductee, Tony Gwynn. Both Cal and Tony have been ideal ambassadors for the game and I could not be happier for the both of them.



See you in Cooperstown on July 29th! Love ya Cal!

Quote of the Day:
"A loud voice cannot compete with a clear voice, even if it's a whisper." -- Barry Neil Kaufman